


Nico Sure Has Some Boobs

by EdamamiTomoe



Category: Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: Breasts, I swear I'll write something more serious some time soon, shitpost
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-30
Updated: 2018-07-30
Packaged: 2019-06-18 21:06:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15494700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EdamamiTomoe/pseuds/EdamamiTomoe
Summary: The Muses are determined to uncover the truth behind Nico's sudden buxom development.





	Nico Sure Has Some Boobs

“Nico, why do you have boobs?”  
“Eli, you can’t just ask someone why they have boobs!”

That’s how it went down the last time the student council president tried to find out why in the world the world’s cutest idol Nico Yazawa suddenly showed up to school one day with massive boobs. Some big ol’ titteroos. Bigger than even the famed booby goddess Hanamaru, greater than even the supreme titty titan Nozomi, at a whopping G cups. As if to accommodate her drastic increase in breast size, even her height has increased, like a sudden growth spurt, putting Nico up as the tallest girl in school, taller than even Eli herself. Overall, it’s as if Nico’s become a completely different person, going from being a short flat-chested girl to a busty bombshell one could easily mistaken to be a milf if they didn’t already know that Nico’s still only a spry 18 year old student at Otonokizaki.

Hours have passed since the Muses have gathered in the student council room, discussing this matter in a space devoid of Niconess, and yet the meeting has thus far remained fruitless. No one can seem to determine the cause of such a sudden change in Nico, and nobody can agree on a single theory.

“I tell you, it has to be an implant. Maybe Nico-chan went to South Korea while we weren’t looking, and got herself breast implants and one of those height extension surgeries.”  
“Shut the fuck up, Umi-chan, not everything’s about implants. Besides, I had sex with her last night, and she was still as flat and short as ever, there was no way she couldn’t have gone to South Korea.”  
“Nontan, have you had a chance to give her the old what for yet? The lethal washi washi?”  
“Of course I have, and I tell you what, Elicchi, I did not feel a single implant in those badonkahonkers, no suspicious lumps or anything either, those felt as real and natural as my tittyhonks do. Except much bigger.”  
“Maybe she became a magical girl, and that’s just her magical-girl-transformed self? Like, it’s just still Nico, except bustier and taller?”  
“Kayochin, I really don’t think that’s it, nya… what if that isn’t even Nico-chan, nya? What if some insidious villain has kidnapped her and taken her place, nya!? We have to go rescue her!”  
“Oh Rin-chan, you and your imagination ~ I’m sure it’s nothing THAT dramatic, maybe Nico-chan just… hit her growth spurt or something, I dunno.”  
“Honoka-chan, I love you, but that’s about the stupidest thing I have ever heard you spew out of your mouth. I say she’s just faking it, padding her chest and wearing stilts or something.”  
“Kotocchi I already said I’ve groped her tonghongagahoogs, those things are as real as you and me. In fact, if anything, I’d say her boobs are realer than the facade you put up everyday.”  
“What did you just say about me you little shit? I’ll have you know-”  
“Guys, everyone, shut the fuck up.”  
“Oh Elichi, I love it when you get all alpha like that.”  
“That includes you too, Nontan. Anyways, we’re not getting anywhere, and I’m getting mighty hungry. I dunno about you, but I’d real love to get home for dinner before I starve to death of malnutrition. We’ll deal with this issue some more tomorrow, and in the meantime, we’ll resume investigation into this dire matter. As the student council president, I declare that it is of utmost importance that we get to the bottom of this. The fate of the universe hangs in the balance. Meating is adjourned.”  
“Elichi, you spelt that wrong.”  
“I know.”

And with that, the student council room clears out, and everyone heads on their way back home, disgruntled and disillusioned at how poorly the meeting went, with such a grave mystery on their hands. Though the hopes of ever uncovering the truth is slight, and things look grim, each of the Muses still resolves to find out just what truly has happened, for both their own sake and the sake of their school.

The next day, things proceeded as normal, or as normal as can be with Nico being in possession of such grand dobonhonkeros. Although, the Muses, in their own careful silent observations, have come to find that Nico’s behaviour has slightly changed in accordance with her breast size. For one, Nico has become slightly more openly flirtatious with her fellow classmates, bending over for seemingly no reason to show off the vast chasms of her cleavage, ‘accidentally’ hitting them with her dohoonkabhankoloos whenever she turns around, hugging her classmates in a way that would suffocate them within her buxom grasp. It is truly a devastating development.

Once again at the meeting, the Muses are arguing amongst themselves, trying to determine just how in the world Nico has grown so much, and what her true objective is. It could be something innocuous, or it could be a dark truth hidden in plain sight.

“I feel as if there has been eldritch developments. Nico has gained access to something forbidden, something humankind is not prepared for.”  
“Umi has played too many horror games. I don’t believe it is anything that strange. If I had to make a guess, she has been cursed by some entity she inadvertently angered, and is trying to cope with her abominable form by overcompensating for it with her newfound flirtatiousness.”  
“Don’t be stupid Maki-chan, I saw how you were drooling over her bonkhagahoogs, you’re not fooling anyone. In fact, I’d say you’re already fallen into her trap.”  
“N-no I’m not, Eli! I wouldn’t fall for her even if she kneecapped me!”  
“Don’t you guys understand? Nico-chan has been playing us all like a deck of cards. She’s probably just built herself a robot to take her place so that she could fool us into thinking she isn’t planning for something even worse, something far more diabolical than we have been led to believe.”  
“Oh Honoka-chan, chun chun. I’d say she simply found a magical tome and used its contents to cast a spell on her breasts, allowing her to have ones greater than the highest mountains of the Himalayas.”  
“Kotori I can’t even fathom how incredibly stupid what you just said was.”  
“Nozomi you better watch it before I go fucking apeshit on your ass.”

All of a sudden, before Kotori and Nozomi can throw down and woop each other’s candyass, suddenly slams open the door, and stood there be Nico Yazawa, with her majestic knockers, and silent goes the student council room. The grand villainess, the final boss, has finally showed up at the junction, ready to fucking party.

Crossing her arms and grinning with a smug look you would expect from a Nico with humongous breasticles chesticles, standing tall with her legs apart like that one chick from that one anime with the clothes and the boobs, Nico chuckles with the smugness of a thousand umus, “All of you are so utterly pathetic. I have simply grown in height and in boobs and all of you absolutely lose your shit as if you’ve taken an entire bottle of laxatives. To think, before I stood beneath you all, and now, I tower over every single one last of you.”

The rest of the Muses remain silent, out of fear of what might happen if any of them made a noise, out of awe at the sheer majesty of the busty buxomness of Nico, out of hatred of the smug bastard smugging at them. Then, Nico speaks once more.

“Wouldn’t you like to know why I have become like this, the secret to my tricks, the Pandora to my box, the cheese dust to my doritos? Huhu, that is fine, I am not above simply telling you all the objective truth, the unbreakable natural law of the universe.” Nico smugs, her smugness literally piercing through the roof of the building without damaging anything else in the building. “The truth is… I have simply coalesced with a bustier and oujo-er version of myself from a parallel dimension.”

“It’s quite simple, really. I wish I could be taller and have bigger torsoballs like a JAV model, not because I’m horny, but simply because I’m insecure AND horny, and she wishes she could be shorter and flatter, not because she has back pains, but simply because she wants to appeal to a different audience. So the two of us have simply coalesced into one interdimensional being, capable of switching between each other’s form at will in a moment’s notice.” As if to demonstrate this power of hers, Nico suddenly reverts back to her normal, flat and short self, and then, once again back to her bustier, taller self. “And that’s why I now have humongous hungolomghononolounghongous. See? It’s that simple. Call now for a free consultation.”

“Oh, so that’s all it was? Huh, alright.” Honoka says nonchalantly.  
“Geez, you could have just told us, Nico.” Eli sighs and shrugs. Bitch about to adjourn the meeting.  
“That’s pretty cool.” Umi smiles a big wide smile.  
“I suppose I’ll have to try it out sometimes myself.” Nozomi high fives herself.  
“I wanna go home and nyap, nya.” Rin stretches.  
“We should probably do some idol practice soon.” Kotori muses, get it, cause she’s a Muse.  
“Who’s up for some checkers?” Maki ignores the situation.  
“I want to go home and jack off to my favourite idols now.” Hanayo comments.

And so the meeting was adjourned, and life returns to normal, how it was before. Except now Nico has coalesced with her parallel dimensional self in order to obtain some popping breasticles. And that was the end of that saga. Don’t forget to eat your celeries, folks.

**Author's Note:**

> I swear to god I'll write something serious soon, I hope. Intimacy with Hanayo's Mom is still a WIP right now. Damn, I need to get back to that. Oh yeah, this was inspired mostly by a busty Nico pic I saw, and I's in a mood to shitpost, so I wrote this.


End file.
